Category: Blog Of Writing +1

June, Month of Mayhem and Madness

Today I sat down to write and realized I hadn’t done a blog post in a few weeks.

Or written in general.

Or read.

Ugh.

Every writer’s worst nightmare is not writing, and the worst part is we alone are to blame. My weekend started off with a simple errand turning into me figuring out how to change my tire. Never done it before and now it’s off the bucket list. Then I spent the remainder of my daytime hours detailing the bathroom. Then I just turned into a potato and kept the lounge company with the TV on.

The next day was work, but then I was looking forward to two days off. Yesterday was Game of Thrones day (we watched the latest episode at eleven and then again at seven) and tried to accomplish something before the day drew to a close. I accomplished a fantastic nap (I’m starting to feel old) and then came my second day off.

Boring right? Same thing for today. Just getting new tires, cleaning, preparing dinner and walking dogs. Now while they’re passed out behind me on the lounge, I finally feel like writing. That being said I still have my partner’s birthday to finish planning and my family’s visit to plan as well. Hard to believe I’m on holidays in less than three weeks, but I’m excited to show them around Australia!

As for my novels, there are tons of ideas I’ve jotted down and begun organizing. The thing I’m struggling with at the moment (aside from actual writing) is keeping my history bits short and sweet. I’m trying to build a world as deep as Middle Earth or Westeros and in doing so, creating many short stories and characters that have no weight in the main story but affect the world to what it is today. This world building is important for both the Jefferson Trilogy and its successor. Jefferson also helps flesh out many of the basic workings of magic for the sequel trilogy and my favorite part is how the magic evolves from the simple to the complexity I’ve begun exploring in the future.

I know this post may be boring to those of you out there writing your own novels, getting published and finding success, but I must say I appreciate those of you out there who are listening and take the time to stop by. I also write these posts to get my own writing engine started and warmed up for the ride ahead. Hopefully your projects are going well and I wish you all the best!

Poor Future TJ

Seven novels.

That’s the plan. A prequel, a trilogy, and another trilogy after that. If I continue on with my current run rate, I’m looking at anywhere between seven hundred thousand to a million words.

A million words.

Nothing makes a person freak out more than adding it all together, instead of breaking it down into manageable chunks. Really, it’s just two series. Present TJ spends a lot of time looking over the lengthy timeline in Scrivener, while poor Future TJ is stuck doing a lot of the writing. Thank the gods for Past TJ. At least that guy got something done!

On the topic of Future TJ, I find myself trying my best to figure out what to do with my stories as discussed many a time here. In light of this, I’ve been listening to some interesting writing Podcasts. I recently listened to one that told me to stop wasting words on my blog.

Every second you’re not writing is a wasted opportunity.

This is very true. This is actually the whole reason I started a blog in the first place, as when writer’s block struck I could come here to get away from my story and do something, anything, to get past that hump. NaNoWriMo was a huge help as I networked with a ton of writers who were struggling just the same as me but now there are still tons in the same boat as me… but there doesn’t seem to be a National Publishing Month (or is there?).

It was brought up in the Podcast that these blogs stick around like a bad smell and if your writing was terrible, then it would be around forever to haunt your dreams. I totally understand where they’re coming from. Hell, I look back at my hairstyles in high school and wonder just what I was thinking. I can only assume this blog will be the same.

In defense of this poor blog, AKA My Diary, I one day hope that other aspiring writers will come here (once I’m rich and famous, HA) and see how insecure and terrible I was at writing. I want them to see the struggle. I want them to see the wins. Most of all, I want them to see themselves as what was, what is and what can be. Bumbling around, writing rubbish and finally winning NaNoWriMo are all a part of the journey and for me, this whole blog is also a part of that.

I might be asking the wrong crowd, but do you lovely folks think there is merit to not having a digital paper trail? Or do you think like me in the sense that this is as much a part of your writing portfolio as the stories themselves?

No matter what, I hope poor Future TJ doesn’t look back on this blog and groan… much like I did when I saw my hair back in my teens. Here’s one for a late TBT!

grade 11
Past TJ! *Groan*

 

Face
Present(ish) TJ!

 

What Now?

There’s always been a part of me that believed I could actually write a novel. I mean, honestly, writing as often as I do I’d have to just get to an ending eventually. The writing process for me was completely haphazard and without a written plan.

Plot? Not exactly.

Characters? Some at the beginning… many along the way.

Setting? It is in a world… indeed.

It was so exciting though experiencing the world through my characters. Their voices carried the narrative and their actions dictated the direction. Could it be better? I’m sure it could. But as my first written novel, I’m damn proud of it! I told everyone who would listen about my story!

My coworkers! (Paid to listen, captive audience!)

My friends! (People who seem really enthusiastic for me!)

My family! (Must love me no matter what!)

Random guy selling me books! (Strangely, genuinely interested… great feeling!)

People on the internet! (In the same boat as me, well… and you out there reading this!)

Finally, I’d written something worthwhile and it was good. The best thing I’d ever written. All the toiling over a keyboard, finally living up to my hopes and dreams. I loaded up my trusty MacBook and stared at my Pages document. Something wasn’t right. Not with the story, but a feeling. If I were a Jedi… I’d imagine this is what a disturbance in the force feels like.

What now?

All the words, characters, settings, and events… what was I supposed to do with them now? I have this responsibility to introduce them to the world and have no idea where to start. Guides online are absolutely hopeless or written by someone self-publishing or trying to get published. You can submit to publishing houses but they slog through probably thousands of unsolicited manuscripts. Some typo sneak into page one of your book? Deleted.

It felt like getting a degree all over again.

You do all the hard yards, get the grades and then they give you the certificate. Congratulations! You’re done! Go out and conquer the world! Then you wake up the next day at noon and wonder why you don’t have a job yet. You finished it! But so did everyone else. Some of them were actually better than you too. So your chances of landing the gig are even less. Then sometimes, it’s just who you know.

That feeling, the disturbance in the force, that diploma, all at once sitting there and joining together in a chorus of mockery.

“Oh, oh wait. You thought that was the hard part?” They laugh. “You poor thing.”

The worst part is while I’ve been searching for all (or any) tips I can find about the step after writing and editing, all  writing website tips seem based around actually just writing.

“Just write.”

“Write it already.”

“You’ll never find the time, you have to make the time.”

“Set a schedule.”

“Find a support group.”

“Read a lot. Write a lot. Read some more. Write some more.”

Okay, okay. Now that I followed everyone’s advice… I look to their other articles, and all of them reiterate the same thing; Writing is the hardest part of writing. I made it though, so what now? It would be like getting to the light at the end of the tunnel and it just being a really bright room.

What the hell do we do now?

And I leave that question for you. If you’ve managed to get some decent advice or found a decent website on how to actually organise a manuscript, please point me in the direction! Thanks in advance!

House Cleaning

Writing comes easy for the most part; The words flow, and I smash them out. The story progresses. The muse is happy, I’m happy… we’re all happy.

Today? Today was not one of such days.

I have a new found appreciation for Tuesdays as they have become my regular day off. This new found appreciation has had some positive influence on my writing schedule, well… until today that is.

I loaded up the Macbook with every intention of writing. I swear it to the old gods and the new! The strangest part of it was while I watched the tiny battery bar at the top right slowly count down the life of my laptop (and subsequently my own life) nothing came to me. 100% seemed to last forever. 98%. 92%. 85%. I shut down the laptop and turned on some Rick & Morty. After two episodes I turned it off. It was still hilarious, but I didn’t feel like watching TV.

Seeking out my phone, I checked my emails, Facebook and Google News. Nothing had come through since I’d last checked. With a heavy sigh, I looked around. The whole day was ahead of me and I was going to waste it somehow. I stared at the piles of stuff that had come from nowhere. No order. No places for things.

Chaos.

My OCD went into overdrive. Suddenly as if my house were Lois Lane, I leapt into action like Superman… well, if he were a maid. With some Danko Jones blaring in the background, I took to my living room with the spray n wipe and some paper towel. I threw things out and decluttered some areas. I cleaned the kitchen again and then took the pups for a walk.

After getting back, I sank into the lounge and disappeared. The dogs climbed all over me until they fell asleep. I stared straight ahead at the ceiling, thinking about my story; Things I could cut out, things I could edit. I’ve been finding it hard to get as excited about writing lately because the path is so unclear. I write because I love it, but I want to become a published author and not spend a ton of money to make it happen. Some people recommend networking, others recommend going for an agent. Me? I have no idea. I’ve spent a ton of time researching how to get published, but it’s like two percent skill and the rest utter luck.

Problem is… I don’t gamble.

Even in retail, there are certainties. In my current position, as long as I continue to excel and keep my chin up no matter how tough or disappointing things get, I will get my own store someday. But this path to becoming a published author? I listen to the stories from so many successful authors about how many times they tried to get published and it’s hard not to think, “What the hell am I doing if it took them that long?” I mean, sure, it’s inspiring to hear how they never gave up. It’s also soul crushing. What if I’m not as good as them? To hear someone like Lovecraft wasn’t famous until after he died… well, that’s exactly what I don’t want. (Not that I’d know I suppose…)

This blog used to showcase my writing and now it feels more like a diary. I write how boring my day was and how hard writing is. I suppose it will be great for others to stumble upon if I get published or if I am published posthumously but lately it has just been frustrating. Especially considering I’m dealing with the same vague instructions in building a house.

There is little guidance in building a house. It comes down to a builder suggesting what you need and then you trying to figure out if that’s close to what you want or not. They leave out things which I expected to be included but that seems to be common practice. I don’t want any surprises! I want a list of things you need to have me build the house and have it perfect for me to move furniture into. It’s doing my head in because you hope there’s not going to be any further expenses.

The reality is, I’m bumbling along trying to enjoy it all and hoping my good fortune will see me through into being published. I really feel like there’s not as much opportunity to be published in Australia for my genre due to the companies that exist here… but hey, tomorrow’s a new day! All I can do is keep my head up and keep on writing!

A Glimpse At Something More

Me in the Shower: Perfect Story Idea, Perfect Dialogue, Perfect Scene.

Me in the Car: Perfect Conflict, Perfect Back Story, Perfect Climax For Novel.

Me at the Computer: WURDZ R GOUD.

 

The mind of a writer is a fickle one. As I stood in the shower I began to come up with a scene, not for either of my novels (completed or current work) but a scene directly tied to both. Magic in my story, at its root, is forbidden and dark with a selfless and light side. This plays into many of the themes throughout my story which can be easily described as a cross between Harry Potter and Star Wars.

As the scene began to play out, characters took shape, dialogue whispered over the drumming of the shower and I decided to finish up in a hurry. The unlucky thing about being a writer is the distance from the bathroom to the laptop is an impossible distance to cross, well at least with anything of quality. By the time you arrive, the concept is a fleeting memory.

That being said, I’ve been growing more interested in George R.R. Martin’s World of Ice and Fire in regards to the fictional history of Westeros. It’s an incredible amount of detail into a story that may only take place within a few decades of time, but the whole world is much richer for it. I could only hope to achieve that level depth (but I am working on it).

As for actually doing some writing tonight… well, as you can probably tell, it’ll be note form only for now until I can flesh that scene back out and get my mojo back. If you hadn’t gathered that, let me give you a bit more insight into my mindset this evening. This post is clocking in at just over three hundred words… and took me an hour and a half to write.

Focus? What is that?

Distractions? I don’t- Hey the TV is on!

Looks like getting back into the habit will be a bit harder than expected, but I’ll get there. Eventually…

I just may not include this in my word count averages per hour…

Wish me luck!

Hello, Is Anyone There?

Wow… 2016. What a way to start off.

I remember as I glanced back over my shoulder at the previous year, I chuckled. This year… This would be my year.

Fast forward to May.

As my birthday came and went, I had a brief moment of clarity. I hadn’t written a single thing since I reused an old draft for my singular post in February. This got me thinking I should probably make sure my laptop is still alive (spoiler: it is) and maybe do some writing.

I could blame my lack of writing on work. After all, stocktake for a manager during retail is a trying time and your routine gets all shot to hell. There are a few weeks of prep and then a week of mostly night shifts and then back into days with recounts. That would be a good reason. But no, that’s not it.

I could blame it on the surprise operation I had on my toe. After all, I was limping around like some sort of zombie and that took quite the toll. Also, not knowing I was about to have a surgery wasn’t exactly a pleasant surprise (I’m still not sure which pain was worse either). But no, that’s not it either.

I could blame it on building a house. Now there’s quite the task and the many smaller tasks that go with it. First off, I feel like 99% of building a house is bumbling around trying to find help and not get swindled out of your current and future life savings. This being an adult thing is hard. But no, that’s still not it!

I could blame it on the fact I finished a novel. Wait! That’s a good thing, isn’t it? It is, but it’s also hard to figure out what to do now. Every ounce of me wants to just put it online for people to see and start getting feedback but that world, my world, deserves better. Before sending it out, it’d be great to have an editor love it. That could definitely be it.

I could blame all of these things together. I could. I’m mentally exhausted. I’m physically worn down. I’m confused on building and writing. I stay positive no matter what happens at work. I invest my time into keeping my sanity.

No.

I haven’t written because I have made that choice.

 

Every day, since February, I have done nothing but zone out to the TV or play Pokemon (I did, however, Catch ’em all) because that was easier. The characters never stop pestering me. They try and entice me with magnificent tales and magic moments that fit directly into my story world at large. Characters plot against one another and conspire to overthrow governments while I shower. There have been times when I wonder if asylums are simply filled with writers who can’t ignore the voices.

I would love to say that today is the turning point. That today I will be the writer I want to be. But for now? I’m still exhausted mentally. I’m emotionally worn down. My mind is trying to figure out this bloody building tender. My first novel begs to be published and I’ve no idea where to start.

As a realist, I need to figure out this house thing first. Secondly, I need to survive until my family comes to visit in July. Thirdly, I need to get back into the habit of writing.

Well… at least I’ve got a start on one thing!

Reconnaissance

For any budding author in my position, the road is far from clear. I’ve managed to write a novel, but now what? Well, instead of dwelling over my inbox (no new emails, just in case you were wondering) I’ve moved on to the next story. As odd as it may sound, I’ve actually had to do a bit of research… on how to start a sequel.

I figured this would be easy, it’s just really a continuation of the first story, right? Not so much. I’ve actually found writing the beginning to the second novel quite a hard start. So I did what anyone would probably do…

I figured, I wonder how everyone else has done it?

One thing I actually found tremendously helpful (read:distracting) was I headed over to Amazon where they’ve got that fantastic Look Inside feature. With this, instead of heading over to my bookshelf to take a quick look through many of the sequels we’ve got in our home, I was able to quickly search through a number of books (especially mainstream ones) for how they started off from the one before it.

This actually would have helped with when I was trying to set the scene for my novel, as I could have done the same thing for the beginning of the trilogy. One of the best ones was just the prologue to A Game of Thrones. The quality of writing in just that first bit makes me feel like I still have so far to go. Which is fine. I mean after all, I am just starting out and that book had an editor go through it. Apples and oranges am I right?

Anyway that small tidbit of advice was really the main reason for this post. Aside from that, business as usual. Now, back to trying to start up that second novel!