One hundred fifty-five.

In grams of chips, this isn’t a whole lot. In books that I’ve plowed through this year? It’s also not a lot in the grand scheme of things.

There are roughly two million books that get published in english alone every year and the average person reads twelve of those. Twelve. One a month. A few years ago, I was the average man, reading my twelve books and completely oblivious to the numbers, ratios and other statistics around book publishing. Now that I own a secondhand bookshop, I feel I owe it to my customers to read more. I decided to make a scuff mark on that ridiculous two million and set a target of two hundred books for 2024. This is the literary equivalent of saying, “I’m going to do a million push ups.” It feels absolutely ludicrous. That being said, I’m three books ahead of schedule.

Now, you’re probably wondering, “How the hell are you managing that many books?!” Which is an absolutely fair question to ask. I have a three year old, a three month old, a wife, two dogs, a small business, and I also try and write. So, while I still manage to sit down and read twelve to thirty books a year (no, I don’t include the books I read my boys), I began listening to audiobooks. And before you start sharpening your pitchforks or lighting your torches, hear me out, you bloody peasant.

My wife, who is my biggest enabler and supporter, stands firmly on the hill of “audiobooks don’t count” and will happily die on said hill, should we ever go to actual war. Meanwhile, I stand firmly on, “sorry, do you mean the original way stories existed?” hill, and will also happily die here too. While the debate rages on, everywhere (including in my shop), the truth of the matter is… don’t yuck someone else’s yum. Audiobooks are incredible tools for accessibility as not everyone gets the luxury of reading a book, but also, they’re a perfectly fine way to revisit your classics. None of these are why I listen though. Not at all.

I listen to audiobooks while my hands are busy but my brain is simply existing. Sure, sometimes I would think up wonderful things. Scenes. Characters. Problem solve. But, I reckon, a lot of that time used to be an absolute wheel of death moment. A window not responding. Homer from the Simpsons spinning in circles on the floor. A dog chasing its own tail. Now? OH HO, BOY! Yeah, I binge like there’s no tomorrow. I shoehorn books into bathroom breaks. Into commutes. Into doing the laundry, the dishes, cooking, and cleaning. I AM A DOMESTIC GODDESS… all thanks to audiobooks. Also, listening to them as fast as I talk (2x speed) means sixty hours of audiobook (aka a four book series such as The Mirror Visitor Quartet, great books by the way) works out to thirty hours!

Don’t get me wrong. I have the IKEA Strandmon, complete with footrest, warm blanket, and over the shoulder lamp. I love to sit down in that chair and devour a book (but also nap… my back cringes at the thought), but with the three year old in bed by 830, the three month old settled by 9, where does that leave me? In fact, this post is being written at 12:38 AM. I still have to shower. I finished the audiobook of Steal Like an Artist by Austin Kleon while I took out the bins and went through some more books in the garage and tidied it up so my wife can get in and out of her car easier. Then, I started Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird (20% done) while I tidied up from dinner and put the dishwasher on. My wife and I currently pass like ships in the night, both on our ways to maintaining a productive and somewhat organised household.

So, to sum it all up… sharpen your pitchforks and light the torches, I’m an audiobook addict and can’t devalue the number of books I’ve managed to get through that I never would have otherwise. Also, being able to get through so many books has enabled to me get to books I wouldn’t have normally or books I would likely never have read. I’m looking at you Julia Quinn’s The Duke & I (which I absolutely loved, that Bridgerton TV show is garbage by comparison). They have their place in passing the time, accessibility, learning differently, and most of all, scratching that itch of not missing out. Two million books might as well be infinity, but at least now, I’m making a scuff mark.

-TJ

PS – If you’ve always wanted to try audiobooks and want to also support my tiny little secondhand bookshop, feel free to download the Libro.FM App and choose “annesnowra” as your preferred shop to earn us commission on any books/subscriptions you buy. Alternatively, you can just go here to look into it. If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to ask in the comments or contact me through the form!