Day eight, just over two thousand words. Not bad considering I spent most of my day driving or with family and friends. I still have roughly an hour left before my daily writing counter ticks over, but I think I’m going to cold shower and sleep. But before I do that, I want to share with you a few helpful tips to really get your word count up. Ones that are supremely helpful, but NaNoWriMo have blacklisted. I call these…
The NaNoWriNOs. *Dun*Dun*Dunnnnnn*
First Tip – Quit Your Day Job
Your journey to fifty thousand words will be wrought with time restrictions and a severe lack of sleep. Should you hope to achieve fifty thousand as soon as possible, quit your day job. Take a chance. You’ll absolutely kill that word count. Don’t worry about those bills. Fifty thousand words first.
Second Tip – Abandon Friends and Family
Most likely it will happen that you are related to someone or have in some uncanny way, attracted a friend or mate. These people are distractions. They will ask you to “hang out” or “party”. These are Satan’s ways of deterring your novel. Give in to them and you might as well sacrifice some goats. Your only option is to tell your family and friends you love them and are leaving the country for thirty days. When they see you at your local coffee shop, typing away with a dirty looking beard, simply speak to them in your made up language of choice and rush away as if your planet needs you. Because it does, after all, who else will write it?
Third Tip – Hygiene
So now that you’ve quit your job and have no friends or family around to bother you, give up on shaving and showering. Those precious minutes? Save them for writing. Bathroom breaks? Bring your laptop. If you are desperate, a tablet in a Ziploc bag is as good as a laptop when cranking out the words. Fifty thousand of them.
Fourth Tip – Sleep
This is something you need to do. The good news is, your body will tell you when you need to do it. It’s quite simple really. Write until you can’t write any more. Then go a bit more. Then a few more words. Then, once you begin typing only in verbs, let the Sandman take you. Your eyes will just close. It’s funny how the body knows when it really needs sleep and when you think you need it.
Fifth Tip – Words
The english language is made up of so many words that it is nearly impossible to make a book out of them. I mean, after all, that would sell all too well. But that aside, you need fifty thousand of them. You’re allowed to repeat. You can make characters stutter. Make them crawl through an echoing cave system. Why use contractions? Have not sounds hundreds of times better than Haven’t. Hitting fifty thousand? Piece of cake.
Sixth Tip – Editing
Simple. Don’t do it. If you spelled something wrong, autocorrect will pick it up. If not, your first reader will. Don’t be embarrassed, simply berate them by asking just how many books they’ve written.
Seventh Tip – Mobile Phones
Are you writing on one? Using it for voice memos? No? Then get the hell rid of that demon device! It will lure you into an Angry Birds induced coma and leave your story unfinished.
Eighth Tip – Description
Tolkien described everything in exquisite detail. Why don’t you? Find new words and use the thesaurus to say the same thing in different ways. I can’t stress enough, fifty-thousand-words.
Ninth Tip – Coffee, Crack, Chocolate
What’s that? You’d like to stay awake permanently? The three Cs of survival are here to help get you there! Once you’ve hit your particular rush, type like a jackhammer powered by The Flash and feel that win. Fifty Thousand Words. Done.
Tenth Tip – (The Most Dangerous One) Have Fun.
This is insanity. This is war. This is a month of solid writing, winning, disappointment, success, failure, watching others win, dropping out and making excuses, and lastly just plain out madness. If you’re not having fun by day ten, just wing it. Throw your plot to the wind and write the characters as if they were in a Scooby Doo episode. Write like no one will read it. Because who cares? You have to write fifty thousand words, and you want-NO! You NEED this win.
Okay, okay. I confess. Not even I follow all of the above (Although I’m sure you’d question some) but some actually have merit… No! I swear! Look, after reading roughly fifty blog posts about day eight and how well/terrible it went for other people, I decided to go in a different direction.
At the end of the day, give it your all. Be proud that you’ve written. Love what you have written. Have faith in your idea and style (by style, grammar and spelling still apply). I want you guys to know that I am cheering you all on from my little corner of the internet and waiting patiently for you guys to hit your own personal target. Can’t get to fifty thousand? Get to The End. Can’t write every day? Don’t. This month isn’t about stress. This month isn’t about writing fifty thousand terrible words. This month at its very core is about the passion of writing. The very act of writing and making the time for it, that is a win. It is so hard in this day and age to focus or to sacrifice our routine to write consistently. So despite that NaNoWriMo website saying you’re behind, or maybe at the end of the month that you haven’t won, who cares? There’s always next month! There’s always next year!
I for one don’t write to become famous. I don’t write to get rich. I write because I love creating. I love the act of writing. Writing is a huge part of my life, and will be the one thing I never give up on. When I self published my eBook Circle of Vengeance, I made it free (everywhere but Amazon who won’t change the price) because I wanted people to read it. I want to know if people like it. I want to know what I could have done better! I want to know what people loved!
Anyway, I just wrote another thousand words here, so I should probably get to bed. Dogs to feed in the morning and work thereafter. Hoping to get over that 25k mid point tomorrow, but I don’t see it happening. One can only do the best that they can though!
(PS- The top ten tips in this article are NOT to be taken seriously. Anyone taking a tablet into a shower in a ziploc bag will indeed ruin their tablet.)
(PPS- I decided today’s post would be light hearted until I talked about passion. I love writing. Don’t forget it.)
(PPPS- Good luck with your own writing!)
(PPPPS- I should have gone to bed exactly nine hundred and forty six words ago.)
(PPPPPS- A book of all the english words is called a dictionary. I’m aware. Thanks though, really.)
AWESOME TIPS! lol. I have abandoned my family, quit my job, and am considering crack to go along with the coffee and chocolate. I did have to draw the line on hygiene however. When I can smell myself, I be stankin’. 😀 Great post, it gave me a chuckle!
I’m glad you got a chuckle 😀 That was my goal. Comments are an added bonus! Thanks for taking the time! I’ve all but abandoned my family, I shower… but this beard… well, I had to try using conditioner on it as I could have scrubbed some pots with it. It is getting unruly. Thanks for stopping by!
“Make them crawl through an echoing cave system” Brilliant. 🙂
Remember- Fifty. Thousand. Words. 😛 Whatever dirty tricks get you there, right? Good luck in your writing and thanks for stopping by 😀 Comments making blogging worth it!
I needed this post. Just a couple of days into the month I realized I was putting so much pressure on myself to write I wasn’t enjoying it and that’s dumb. I also laughed out loud as this post, which is always fun. “Be proud that you’ve written. Love what you have written. Have faith in your idea and style.” Yes, yes. My only goals this month. And also to write 50,000 words. 🙂
I totally understand what you mean. I agree that for some people setting that daily target and having that deadline puts a fire under them. But that’s not for everyone. I think NaNoWriMo almost needs to do better follow up during the year (even if the emails or messages are automated) to get you to finish that novel.
Just remember why you’re writing. Because I know you love it, so don’t lose sight of that. The moment it becomes a job, you simply will not hit that word count. Writing for me is a release, that reward at the end of work, it’s what wakes me up in the morning. It’s the first thing I think of when I get out of bed, and it’s the last thing I think of before heading into dreamland.
Thanks for stopping by and I’m glad you had a laugh 😛 I decided to change it up from the, “I made it to this many words today” as it was beginning to sound like a support group post and go for something a bit different. Take care, good luck and remember, love your writing! I promise it’ll love you back!
I’m definitely loving it today! It feels good.
Keep that feeling for the rest of the month! Love what you do and it’ll love you too! 😛 Life lessons from yours truly hahaha
Hilarious post 😀 Also, I totally take my laptop into the bathroom with me, lol. I figure that as long as I wash my hands, no harm done, right?
Hahaha, Oh my, I take my phone with my, but my laptop? I’d be terrified I’d drop it in the toilet! (Don’t even begin to questions the logistics behind how that would be possible, but I’d find a way!)
(I’m going to combine my comments for your last post with my comments for this post, ’cause this is NaNoWriMo and I’m all about efficiency :P)
In your last post–I really don’t know how people manage to write 50 000 words in one week. I love writing, but I could never do it all day long. I like giving the words and the story time to steep in my mind, simmering into something that will be mouth-wateringly delicious by the end (I’m a bit hungry…). And so, as impressive as it is that someone finished already… I like that I’m taking my time. It’s more fun for me. Like you say, we can’t compare ourselves to other people’s successes, we just gotta fulfill our own goals.
For this post–I love it. Those tips sound spot-on. I shall seek to employ them immediately. Haha but they were a great pick me up, thank you 😀 As for that last part there, about the purpose of NaNoWriMo, and why you love writing–I could imagine my own voice speaking those words. I connected with that. NaNoWriMo for me has just been about the joy of writing every day, not the stress of getting to the finish line. And writing overall… I do it because there is something intoxicatingly beautiful about using my hands and my mind to create something. It’s not about fame or money at all.
I feel like this post is something we all needed to see today as we go into week two. Thanks for writing it 🙂
Well done on your efficiency Alex, I commend you! My efficiency has been writing and sleeping in the same spot (occasionally at the same time). It’s a skill, and not one I’d recommend!
I can definitely understand people who write 50k in a week. I probably could! My issue is, what else do these people do? I mean I have a full time job as an Assistant Manager, a girlfriend and two dogs… quite simply, how would I do it? But as for me writing, honestly, I could write all day every day. (Maybe I’ll touch on my inspiration in the daily blog post!) But definitely don’t compare yourself to others. Be happy with your own accomplishments and try and beat those! It’s your pace and if you’re always improving, one day you will be the best you can be!
I’m so glad this piece has been a good read for all the other writers out there! It’s great that the community is just writing (and suffering) together at the same time. I remembered that last year I wasn’t part taking in NaNoWriMo, but tried to meet many people who were and cheer them on! It’s a horrible feeling doing a blog post and having it drift along with the tumbleweeds. I hoped that my comments last year got someone a boost!
Also, as I’m sure you know, it was my absolute pleasure to write this and an absolute honor to know so many great folk who are in the same boat I am. Thanks for swinging by and hopefully both our counts keep going up! (Decided to reply to all of my comments first, you guys are all so important to my continual blogging!)
I really don’t know if they could possibly do anything but sit in front of their screens all day. How could they uphold a social life or family life or working life and write that many words in so few days? A mystery, really. Those magical people. (Or maybe they really do spend their entire days sitting in front of the screen, I don’t know :P)
It is so fun, to know that there are people out there going through the same torments you are. Inspiring and wonderful! I’m glad you reached out to me last year; it was great having that extra support from the community 😀
I did just spend my whole day on my computer, and got the 6k… so I suppose it is possible to write 10k a day. Still… that’s crazy, I at least have to eat and the such!
I’m glad I came across your blog and I do check in every once in a while (Although I barely have enough time to reply to my own comments!) Lately I enjoyed your Black Knight post (You took my advice! Awesome!)
Well, now I’m off to work and then I’ll be home to write. Next blog post in like 14 hours, WEEEEE! Also everyone has called in sick at work, so it should be great fun being four people down. Ah well, good thing I’m paid!
And I continue to be amazed. That’s a wonderful chunk of words! I agree with the crazy part though–I’d go insane trying to do that, especially multiple days in a row! Apparently hard-core writing is not for me 😛
Aha yeah, I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂 I can’t just go ignoring the advice of my loyal followers, can I? And that movie is a blast, I was quite happy to relive the joy of the Black Knight 😀
Have fun at work with all those people missing, yeesh! I shall eagerly await your next blog post (whilst writing frantically to catch up!).